Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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