This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
