Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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