if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
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