If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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