after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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