My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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