i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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