Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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