She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
