It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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