Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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