if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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