The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
