My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
