help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Randomize
