I just made out with a guy for $7.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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