what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Randomize
