ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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