This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize