he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
