dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
