I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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