She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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