Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
