OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
