Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
