You were right. It hurts to walk today.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Randomize
