the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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