can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
my sisters under your porch take her home
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize