So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
