someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
