I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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