and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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