I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I forget how to act sober
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
