either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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