What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Randomize