She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
