I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
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I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
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We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
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