Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize