She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Green mimosas i think yes
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Your penis caused this!
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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