U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
