I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
