why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize