This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
