A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
