Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
