Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
