So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Randomize
