guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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