i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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